Babycakes (babycakesin) wrote,

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Once upon a time, there was the return of Richard Hammond

*squee* I'm watching the first episode of the ninth season of Top Gear, the one in which Richard Hammond comes back after his major accident. It's awesome to see him again, and you can tell Jeremy and James are glad he's back and okay.


Jeremy Clarkson: Anyway listen this is the big question I guess everybody wants to know. Ready? Are you now a mental?
Richard Hammond: No! I'm not! I'm fixed! I'm completely fixed and normal and healed thank you what are you doing?
James May: Well you know it's a, it's a tissue for if you start dribbling.
Richard Hammond: That's all I've had for four months.
James May: What, tissues?
Richard Hammond: No! People hanging around just watching waiting for my eyes to point in different direction and me to go bonkers. I'm fixed. I'm normal.
Jeremy Clarkson: Are you the same person that you were before?
Richard Hammond: Yes. I mean the doctors were worried because it's brain damage - about you know, personality change or whatever, but, no the only difference between me now, and me before the crash, is I like celery now and didn't...
James May: And if I take you to the pub are you still going to want to punch me in the face after fifteen minutes?
Richard Hammond: Yes though that's to be honest, more your personality than mine.
Jeremy Clarkson: I always want to punch him in the face after fifteen minutes - sometimes less.


They showed us his tries, toward the end, in which he was basically on 'a chair strapped to a plane engine' - his words, not mine *shakes head in disbelief* boys and engines...


Richard Hammond: [Richard's prophetic words to camera before his accident] So my challenge today is to drive this thing, except, that's not the full story because my challenge today is to drive this thing and hit this innocent-looking little button. Because when I do that, it send a flame, shooting through the engine which ignites the afterburner. And when that happens I haven't got 5,000 horse power, I've got, 10,000 horse power, and possibly the biggest accident, you've ever seen in your life.

It was moving at the end of it when he (obviously) got scared (I mean... a plane engine, dude!) and he screams 'I'm alive! I'm alive!'. And you can tell he had a blast. And then, his third try, it's the accident. The way he comments on it, his voice gets really quiet and there is a big silence in the studio... then of course Jeremy start making fun of Richard, of course lol


Jeremy Clarkson: [referring to Richard's jet-car crash] I could've held it.
Richard Hammond: What, in the world's longest power slide? Whilst telling us the price and there was no room in the boot?


The final promise: they will never mention the crash in the show again.

ETA: from another Top Gear episode:
Jeremy Clarkson: Anyone who washes their car either has a small mind, or an unhappy marriage.
Richard Hammond: I turn it into a family occasion. My eldest daughter is five, and she loves cleaning the car with me. We share it.
Jeremy Clarkson: Do you live in a yogurt commercial?
Tags: quotes, top gear
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